There was a moment about three
weeks ago in which I had no idea what I was going to do. I had just finished
the final ‘negotiations’ with the man I had been teaching tennis under. He had
screamed at me for costing him so much time, energy, and money, ‘all for
nothing’. I returned his keys and walked down from the
courts on the roof of the wet market for the last time. Shaking, I walked with
Adrian the Canadian (my international support posse) to the nearest 7-11, where
I purchased a German-brewed tallboy to calm my nerves. So there I was:
homeless, unemployed, and drinking outside of a convenience store on a weekday
before noon. How the mighty have fallen. At first glance, this may look like a dismal
scene. But once the shock of such aggressive confrontation dissipated, I
realized that I was happy. I didn’t know the details at the time, but this was
the beginning of a new, beautiful life for me.
Staying with the Canadians was
the storm after the storm- but a good storm this time. Adrian and Roberta have
five children ranging from ages 5 to 15, two of which have been adopted from
China. As Adrian puts it, ‘It was cheaper to move the whole family to China
than to keep adopting kids from here’. Adrian, Roberta, Kole, Dawson, Gemma,
Ping, and Lukai have welcomed me into their home like a sixth child. The
Canadians moved to China earlier this year to help out at New Day. Adrian and
Roberta made the decision to come to China after realizing that their life in
Canada did not hold the kind of happiness they wanted for their family. They
sold everything and made the move, following a higher calling. Adrian is
working to build a database that will ideally connect all of the orphanages in
China- a system that doesn’t yet exist over here. Roberta and the kids help at
New Day in any way they can, mostly by playing with and loving on children.
They are an amazing family. Check them out here. It felt good to be a part of a family’s rhythm. In
their four-bedroom apartment, they made room for me the second I said I might
need a place to stay. Each morning I would wake up to the sounds and smells of
breakfast time: bowls clinking, nutty oatmeal wafting through the air, and
quiet conversation. Exhausted from the stress of such drastic transition, I
would finally roll out of bed in the mid-morning and greet the family before
heading across the road to New Day. Spending time with the foster children at
New Day fills my heart up, regardless of what’s happening in the rest of my
life. I help the nannies feed the pre-school kids lunch, then play with or read
to the children before naptime. Then I head upstairs to the nursery where my
heart melts again for the beautiful babies that light up like Christmas trees
when someone picks them up. I cannot even express how adorable these children
are-I don’t possess the literary capabilities- so here is the link to see for
yourself>
For the first few days that I
stayed with the Canadians, I simply walked around Kaiyin (the suburb of
Zhongshan where I live now- where the Canadians live and New Day is located.
Many foreigners live and play here…it’s almost not China…..almost…) and
thought. I thought about what went wrong with teaching tennis, what part I
played in it, what I could have done differently, and what I was going to do.
For four days I walked for hours, pondering these questions. On the fifth day,
the answer hit me. I am going to do whatever I want to do. It was that simple.
I asked myself what it is I wanted to do. I wanted to serve at Jam Cafe.
Jam is a café/bar in Kaiyin that
I had eaten at a few times before moving to Kaiyin. It is owned by two lively Russian
women, Masha and Jenya, who work HARD. It is a favorite place for locals to
gather in Kaiyin, as the Western food and coffee is delicious. I thought Jam
Café would be the perfect place for me because many people go there- people
that I like- people I can learn from-people who will bring richness to my life.
I walked to Jam and asked to speak to Masha or Jenya, but they were gone.
It has been great serving at
Jam. I’ve taken over the evening shift, which is perfect for a night owl like
me. They have given me free reign to plan events that bring people together and
offer something fun to do during the week. Last week we had a good turnout for
game night, and tomorrow night we are playing Beer Bingo, with 10% of the
alcohol proceeds going to New Day Foster Home. It is great getting to know
everyone around Kaiyin, too. Everyone here has an interesting story. All it
takes is to sit down and ask, ‘So, how did you get to China?’ and a magical
tale will present itself over the span of a few Carlsbergs. It is a beautiful
use of my time and I am so happy to have the opportunity to meet some of these
characters. There is Gordon from England (the business owner who first
introduced me to Jerry and Ann), Len from Australia (a man who, upon learning
that Facebook would be blocked in China, created his own version- ZS Renn), Elena
from Singapore (a brilliant, vicious businesswoman who makes incredible plum
Jam), Tom from Australia (he’s like a little piece of Newks in China),
Francesco from Italy (I’m learning every Italian curse word by playing tennis
with him), and many more. I love the relationships and conversations that
unfold at the tables of our little café.
Now, life is perfect in its own
way. I have moved out of the Canadian household and in with a German couple
across the street that offered me their spare room. Thorston and Sonja are possibly
the sweetest people in Kaiyin. They have a 5-month-old baby girl, Zina, who is
absolutely adorable. It was difficult to move away from the Canadians because I
have fallen in love with those stinkin’ kids. But, as I’m currently sitting on
their deck writing this blog, eating a bowl of cereal from their kitchen and planning
on playing freeze tag with the little Canadians on the playground later today,
I would say that it has worked out for the best. Everything has worked out for
the best.
The community is getting excited
about our walk, too. Ann has been spreading the word to her circle of friends.
This results in many people responding, ‘Oh, you’re the girl walking to Beijing
with Ann!’ upon meeting me for the first time. Even though I have limited
technology skills and aspirations (Last week I lost my phone and computer
charger for three days and didn’t miss either), my next step is to take this
project online. It’s a struggle that I’m looking forward to conquering. Ann and
I have solidified our route, after many hours crawling over maps of China
spread out on Ann and Jerry’s living room floor. Support is building,
excitement is growing, and plans are being made.
When I got on the plane to come
to China, I never could have imagined that my life would look like it does
today. Between planning The Walk, playing with babies, cooking for Canadians,
and serving foreigners beer, daily life is different than even my strangest
dreams, and for that, I am so very thankful.
